Actor-turned-humanitarian Somy Ali, who runs the US-based NGO No More Tears, has spent years working with survivors of domestic violence, human trafficking and abuse. Known to Bollywood audiences for films such as Anth, Teesra Kaun, Chupp, Krishna Avtaar, Yaar Gaddar, Andolan, Mafia and Aao Pyaar Karen, Somy later stepped away from the spotlight to dedicate herself to humanitarian work.
As October marks Domestic Violence Awareness Month, Somy believes the issue cannot be treated as a campaign that begins and ends with the month. For No More Tears, the fight against abuse continues every day of the year.
“October does not arrive for us as a campaign. It arrives as the month when the rest of the world finally says out loud what our line hears every single day,” says Somy.
According to her, No More Tears receives around 30 calls a day, many of them related to domestic violence. The organisation operates seven days a week, including holidays, and handles cases involving domestic abuse, human trafficking, immigration issues and other forms of violence.
“Domestic Violence Awareness Month is the one time strangers ask the question we live inside: Is she safe tonight? For No More Tears, that question is not seasonal. Abuse does not take a day off. The calls do not take a day off,” she says.
Somy believes awareness alone cannot change a survivor’s life. She stresses that conversations and social media campaigns must translate into tangible support for those trying to escape abusive situations.
“A purple ribbon is not the work. The work is the night after the ribbon, when someone finally believes she can leave. Awareness is not enough. A post is not a bed. A hashtag is not a lawyer. If the month ends and no one has paid a first month’s rent, we have decorated the problem,” she says.
Somy says her own experiences, along with her interactions with immigrant women, influenced her decision to establish No More Tears.“I started No More Tears because I had lived the silence, in my own childhood, and in the lives of immigrant women who had nowhere to go that understood their language, their visa, their fear of being sent back,” she recalls.
Over the years, the organisation has handled thousands of cases. Somy explains that not every call results in housing, as survivors may need legal assistance, immigration support, therapy, employment opportunities or referrals to other agencies, depending on their circumstances.
The NGO has also dealt with cases of human trafficking, including young women trafficked through massage parlours. Somy says some survivors face another battle when their own families refuse to accept them because of social stigma and notions of family honour.
“Honour is bringing her home. Honour is believing her. Honour is not the silence that keeps a perpetrator comfortable,” she says.
Somy recalls several cases that highlight the importance of providing survivors with long-term support rather than limiting assistance to an immediate rescue.
In one case, a young woman from Bangladesh was brought to the US on a fiancé visa and subsequently faced severe abuse after marriage. No More Tears helped her access shelter, therapy, legal assistance, employment and driving lessons. A donor also provided her with a car, helping her move towards independence. She eventually divorced, rebuilt her life and later had a child.
In another case, a young man from Mumbai experienced violence after being outed to his family. When the situation escalated and his life was threatened, No More Tears helped him reach the US, where he received assistance with asylum, therapy, education and shelter. He has since rebuilt his life.
For Somy, domestic violence is not restricted to any particular economic class. She believes that while financial circumstances may change the nature of abuse, the fear and control experienced by survivors remain the same.
“It is not a poor person’s crime. I have sat with women who had staff, and women who had nothing. Money changes the method. In a poor house it is a fist and nowhere to go. In a rich house it is a lawyer, a reputation, a phone that is tracked, a visa that can be cancelled, a child used as the leash. The fear is the same,” she says.
Somy believes the solution lies in making it easier for survivors to leave abusive relationships and ensuring that support continues beyond the immediate crisis. She also emphasises the need to educate young boys about healthy relationships, teach girls that silence is not loyalty and challenge the social acceptance of abusive behaviour.
“Believe the first report. Most women are not dramatising. They are minimising,” she says.
For Somy, rescuing a survivor is only the beginning. She believes that rebuilding a life requires sustained emotional, practical and financial support, often long after the immediate danger has passed.
“Rescue is the first hour. Healing is the next year. Therapy, a licence, a first apartment, someone who still answers when the nightmare comes back. That is what No More Tears is for,” she says.
As October brings renewed attention to domestic violence, Somy hopes the conversation will continue long after awareness campaigns end. For her, the real measure of change lies in the support survivors receive throughout the year.
“October is the month we ask you not to look away. The other eleven months, every day of them, are when we find out if you meant it,” she says.
